When spoiled with too many choices, we often tend to get lost in confusion while making decisions. However, when what you¡¯re looking for is hard-to-find, you treat each option with extra care and mostly value the one you end up choosing. That is exactly what online dating comprises of for the LGBTQ+ community.?
In comparison to straight people, the number of homosexuals looking for love digitally is way less. However, dating apps are saviours in disguise for the LGBTQ+ community.?
In order to meet people, they used to depend on bars, clubs or simply wait for someone to set them up. Thanks to the invention of these apps, they can finally be on the lookout for someone to date without having to guess people¡¯s orientation before hitting on them.
In fact, according to a survey carried out by Clue, a female-health app and Kinsey University, twice as many LGBTQ+ people use these apps in comparison to their heterosexual counterparts.?
The platform for them to finally be themselves without the fear of hitting on a homophobic straight person is doing wonders for the community. According to data collected by the Federal Bureau of Investigation, LGBTQ+ people were at maximum risk when it came to such situations. For instance, hitting on someone in a bar which turns violent. The same cannot be said for straight people.?
These apps are providing them with a sense of safety and is also helping them to connect with other people from the community.?
The people of the community have been subjected to hate crimes over and over again. The decriminalisation of Section 377 which made homosexuality illegal was a huge leap towards progress of humankind.?
However, there is still a long way to go when it comes to people, especially heterosexual people, understanding that homosexuality is no longer a concept they can nullify or simply have a problem co-existing with.?
With the help of online dating apps, LGBTQ+ people have the freedom to not engage with someone who could be homophobic and peacefully find a partner within the community.?
However, like every coin has two sides, the dating scene for LGBTQ+ people also comes with a dark side.?
Unfortunately, discrimination isn¡¯t just a heterosexual thing and ironically, people who fight for equal rights also have a flawed idea about certain concepts.?
Indiatimes spoke to a member of the community, *Arnav Das and discovered the other side.
¡°Racism is the first thing that comes to my mind when I think of problems within the LGBTQ+ community and online dating. Another one is fem-phobia; Gays have a problem with other gays who have feminine tendencies. They believe that being feminine is a stereotype and a lot of us get rejected by so-called macho gay men on the basis of how we choose to behave. For a community that is constantly at war with the rest of the world in order to be completely free, I believe this is a huge setback.¡±
Even though one¡¯s sexual orientation isn¡¯t a choice, there are a lot of people who are either confused about their own or simply curious about how the other team plays. Sometimes, this turns out to be a risky involvement for the one who is a 100% sure of his/her sexuality because sometimes the curious one decides to sway back to the straight path.?
*Arnav added,
¡°Of course, that is a huge risk. You can get your heart broken if the other person decides or realises that this isn¡¯t for them. However, I personally believe that since you were already aware of the whole dynamics of their situation, you can¡¯t really blame them if it goes down the drain. That is a risk you were willing to take and the thing with risks is that the outcome isn¡¯t really in your hand.¡±
Then there are concepts that are no different than what the straight community also participates in. Not wanting to commit, ghosting or simply using people for sex happens on the other side too.?
However, *Arnav believes that due to the fact that people from the community have been deprived of such connections, there is a sense of desperation within them.?
¡°Everything is always made keeping straight people in mind and finally, there are these apps that are selectively paying attention to us. There are going to be people who¡¯ve never had a chance at the dating game due to several reasons and now they finally have a platform. I don¡¯t blame them if they express some desperation. In the end, we are all human beings."
*Name changed to protect the privacy of the individual.