The wedding season is here. Whether it's your own marriage or that of your friend or relative, the fun and joyful environment surrounding weddings is something we all love, don't we??
But amidst the tons of discussions we have with our close-knit group about marriage and life ahead, one topic that often takes a backseat, especially when it comes to our future life partner, is finances.?
Contrary to what many of us are advised when it comes to the ¡®avoidable¡¯ money talks, it's actually a wise thing to hold the ¡®not-so-talked-about¡¯ money conversation with your life partner, more so before you get hitched. Eager to know how and why? Read on as we unfold this aspect for you!
First of all, no matter how many people run behind you or advise you to talk about everything except money, you have to remain firm on your decision to hold the financial talks with your partner, one on one. In fact, the reason behind money being a deep-rooted issue amongst many couples is the lack of financial conversations. And no, it's not something only one particular gender is supposed to handle or take care of. It's equally important for both to be on the same page when it comes to finances, regardless of the other partner¡¯s choice of career or whether they are earning or not.
Now, to have those ¡®money talks¡¯ with your partner before saying "I do", having a calm mind and honest intention is the key. With these two aspects sorted, you can go ahead and hold a conversation with your partner through these ways:
To know and understand each other¡¯s take on finances, it's first important to ask your partner about their financial background. That includes knowing the financial position of their parents in growing years, the ups and downs they faced in terms of finances, and what ideologies they hold towards handling finances.
In all likelihood, our perspective towards something is highly dependent on our background and what we have gone through and grown up with. In fact, your financial background impacts your lifestyle as well. Like, someone may choose to remain low key despite having lakhs of rupees, whereas someone else might attempt to live a high profile life or show off with whatever they have. Every person¡¯s lifestyle is highly dependent on their financial background and the perspective they have towards money.?
So, all in all, having such conversations regarding your partner¡¯s financial background, ideology and lifestyle, especially before getting hitched, can go a long way in helping you both land on the same page instead of remaining divergent when it comes to money talks.
You are likely to live your entire life with your partner after marriage, right? Even children would one day grow up and walk on their respective paths, and later have their own family as well. So, it all boils down to the fact that the two of you would be spending maximum periods of your lives together, going through thick and thin.?
Then why not kickstart this beautiful journey by sharing each other¡¯s experiences in life, especially on the financial front? After all, experience is the biggest learning of life, and the two of you can provide insights into each other¡¯s past experiences which drive your take on money. This way, not only will you both increase each other¡¯s knowledge but even expand the horizon of thoughts as well. And then there's no looking back.?
Don't start questioning each transaction they do or point out a particular expense. This would not only show a lack of trust but also suffocate your partner, which can lead to them trying to hide things from you instead of being totally open and transparent. So, the best way is to give that breathing space and independent decision-making power to your partner, while staying on the same page in terms of life goals, financial disclosures, budgeting etc.
Another key component of your ¡®money talks¡¯ has to be on jotting down each other¡¯s life goals, plus aligning and prioritizing them mutually. This way, you both ensure that no one¡¯s life goals are looked down upon or ignored, and a solid actionable plan can be put in place regarding how to step closer towards each goal one by one in life.
Financial conversation with your partner can not be complete without disclosing each other¡¯s existing assets and liabilities, since these are crucial parts of your financial life.? And when you both are open towards disclosing such information without having the slightest of doubt on each other, you strengthen your bond as well, because disclosing all the big and small details increases the level of trust in each other. That's exactly why the lack of such financial conversations and disclosures becomes a deep-rooted issue amongst couples and weakens their trust as well.
The unpleasant thought of having to live without your partner is what often drives us away from holding conversations on life¡¯s uncertainty. But that's exactly where you have to be open and accepting towards life's uncertainties and have honest conversations with your partner. In fact, a lot of times, even when a spouse has taken insurance for the family, they refrain from actually in, especially in cases of life insurance.?
And the consequences? In case of the untimely death of the spouse (policyholder), family and spouse are unaware of the presence of any life insurance! And hence, the policy in all likelihood would remain unclaimed, therefore depriving the family of the deserving benefits.
So, the key lies in being totally transparent with your spouse regarding this insurance aspect, instead of keeping the other one in the dark, which leaves them vulnerable to face the repercussions.?
Also Read:?Worth Explains - Why A Term Plan Is The Only Life Insurance You Need
Last but not the least, the conversations should never have a dead-end, especially when it comes to the points of conflict. It¡¯s natural and quite expected that two people can have different perspectives towards a particular thing. Like one may prefer to continue living on rent while the other prefers to have a home of their own, or the other may prefer to drive a sedan or SUV car while the other may be content with a hatchback.?
The points of conflict can be many. But that's exactly where you have to stand together as a couple and sort out the way out, for which the key remains in understanding each other¡¯s point of view and accordingly jotting down actionable plans, like instead of jumping towards applying for a home loan and buying property you can plan it out, maybe for the next five years or so. Through such planning, you can sort out your points of conflict without hurting your finances in any way.
Also Read:?Frequently (Not) Asked Questions - Is It Worth Taking A Loan To Buy A Car?
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