Why Are A Lot Of Couples Delaying Parenthood? Here Are Some Of The Most Common Reasons?

The times have changed, and so have the ideologies of people who get into relationships. Sure, marriage is something that most people look up to. In the end, people want to put a stamp on their love, and it is pretty much the best feeling.

However, today's couples are not of our parents' generation, and having children after marriage is not something these couples aspire to.Sure, the grandmothers will disagree with this ideology, but the millennials of Generation Z are far more educated and understand the value of partnership.

So, what are couples thinking nowadays when they decide to delay parenthood?

They want to focus on their careers first

Gone are the days when men had to be the sole earners in the house and women were supposed to look after the household. But now, with the advancement in education and work culture, both men and women make careers their topmost priority. So, if a child comes into the picture, one of them has to forget about the career they have worked so hard on and take on parenthood. That is not something couples are willing to compromise on anymore.

"My husband and I are working in different cities, and I don't have any family to help me out if we ever plan on having kids. I don't plan to take care of a kid all by myself and give up on my career while I and my husband are already living apart," says Saloni.

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They want to spend more time with each other

Couples who love marriage or arrange it want time to get to know each other better after they marry. They want the time to understand one another and celebrate each other's union by connecting on a deeper level. When a kid comes into the picture, it will definitely leave no time for the couple. Thus, giving each other more time is something couples are prioritising nowadays.

"My parents chose the arranged marriage setup for me. While I did meet my wife for a couple of months before we got married, we both agreed upon getting to know each other more, and that meant no children for a while. Now, we choose ways to spend time with each other by travelling and that wouldn't have been possible if we had a child straight after marriage," says Mani.

Global warming and climate change

If you still feel that climate change is a hoax, then maybe there is a lot of reading you need to do. Temperature changes, weather shifts, and untimely natural disasters are all signs of how climate change is steadily proving how future generations will face a slew of crises if precautions are not taken. Couples are now aware of this fact and do not want to have a child in inclement weather.

"I am living in a place like Delhi, where the AQI, as we all know, is beyond normal levels. I myself am having trouble breathing, and my eyes water all the time, especially during the winter. Why would I want a child to be a part of this?" says Kunal.

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There are medical advancements in childbirth now

Early pregnancy was considered a good option for a woman during our grandparents' or even our parents' time because later pregnancy apparently caused problems. However, now there are several ways one could have a baby at any time and age. These advancements include in vitro fertilisation, egg freezing, foetus freezing, and surrogacy.

"I and my husband have been learning about the concept of freezing the eggs because, at the moment, we don't think we are ready for kids. This is one procedure I can do right now, and when we both feel we want kids, we can easily go ahead with it without any complications," says Stuti.

They want to be mentally ready

While the elderly members of the family say that having a kid will solve all the problems, in reality, this definitely isn't the case. Thanks to the stress and pressure in one's daily life, more people are going through several mental illnesses. Especially after the pandemic, the rate at which people have anxiety and depression is much higher than usual. However, more than the usual amount of weddings occurred during this time. But if the childbearers don't think they are able to take care of themselves, they don't want to take responsibility for a new human being.

"I lost my long-term boyfriend during the first phase of the pandemic, and my parents got me married the next year. Now, it has been a year since my wedding, and I'm not able to mentally get over everything. I'm clinically depressed and work with people who are. How can I even take care of a child? That's too much pressure," says Kritika.

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They want to be financially ready

While a kid may bring happiness to one's life, it surely has no effect on financial status. Couples nowadays are learning more and more about how to raise a child and realising that it is not a piece of cake. It isn't just about the nine months; it is about giving top-tier resources to the kid. In these times, parents have to spend lakhs of rupees just to get their children some decent education and nutrition, and most can't afford it.

"I and my husband are both working, and we are at a stage in our careers where we are just starting to fulfil all our needs. Having a child will not only require us to completely disregard our own needs, but it will also necessitate a significant amount of basic cost-cutting for the rest of our lives in order to provide the child with what they deserve. Perhaps we will wait until we have more financial stability," says Saloni.

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Bringing a child into the world is completely a personal choice, and the rules of marriage do not define that. Several couples choose to make their own rules after marriage, which can include having a baby early on, later, or not at all. Bringing societal pressure or judgement in this case makes it more difficult for a couple already adjusting to huge life changes.