After Suhagraat Impotence, Wife Demands Divorce And Dowry Refund

Dissatisfaction with sexual life isn't a reason women from rural India usually cite when asking for a divorce. But newly-married Fatima Biwi (name changed) from Katna village in Murshidabad sought divorce because her husband has erectile dysfunction. She also wanted her in-laws to return Rs 55,000 cash and assets worth Rs 55,000, which Fatima brought as dowry. After a series of meetings, Fatima won the case on Saturday.

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Last week, a complaint made by Fatima was discussed at a meeting in the presence of both families. Barely two weeks ago, 18-year-old Fatima was married to Wasim Abbas (name changed) from Khechuri village in Burdwan district. After the ceremonies, when members from the girl's family went over to her in-laws' house, some of them got to know about Wasim's sexual problems. But Fatima was too new a bride to make any complaints then.

It was after she returned to her father's house that she broke down. When her family advised she seek justice, Fatima approached Shabnam Ramaswami, founder of an NGO called Street Survivors India.

Ramaswami said: "Since 2002, villagers have been approaching us to sort out their problems. This includes cases where a woman or a man have problems in their relationships or when a girl has been denied her rights to her house and assets. At our Stree Shakti Prokalpo, we have a forum where women's issues are discussed. Fatima's case was addressed here."

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When TOI spoke to Fatima, she said, "On our wedding night, I realised that my husband has erectile dysfunction. In our village, marriages have broken up earlier. But no girl has ever cited impotence as a reason."

Fatima said she had no fear while discussing the problems in front of everyone. That attitude stumped filmmaker Debarati Gupta when she accidentally became a witness to a dispute-redressal meeting.

"I had gone to this village for some research work when I heard about this on-going dispute from Shabnam (Ramaswami). While the groom's family wanted Fatima to give some time before walking out, her family insisted the marriage be called off immediately. They feared the delay might lead to Fatima being branded infertile," she said.

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"On Friday, they were taken to the Kandi court. The cost of the divorce was borne by both families. Wasim's family has handed me the cash to be returned to the bride's family. Wasim's mother has requested that in lieu of the assets, she would rather give Rs 55,000 to Fatima's family. That money has already been paid on Friday. I have also assured Wasim that I will connect him to a sexologist to address his issue," Ramaswami said.

"On Wednesday, Wasim's family is going to come over to take the divorce papers. That's when the dowry money will be returned to us formally ," Fatima said.

Some from her village had teased Fatima for speaking up on such an issue. "But had I not spoken up, I would have had to suffer all my life," Fatima said