A few years ago, while you were still evading deadlines and trying to fib your way around college, you wouldn¡¯t even have dreamt of this question.
But now that you are older, there are times when you feel that the unthinkable has happened, and that your folks might not be as bad as your teenage mind had made them out to be. In fact, you enjoy their company (at times) and wouldn¡¯t even deny that they could be really cool.
Only glitch? Well, desi kids will always remain kids in the eyes of elders. It is true, Indian parents aren¡¯t trained to ever accept that their children are grown up and fully functional individuals. If you can, however, escape this trap most families fall into ¨C you could perhaps be friends with your parents.?
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Our parents are as obsessed with their phones as we are. This means they are way more ¡®with the times¡¯ than we could have ever imagined. The upside to this is that they don¡¯t live in a shell and know way more about the world than the generations before them did.
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For your parents to have a more equal relationship with you ¨C one in which they take you seriously and don¡¯t coddle you all the time ¨C you will have to first prove yourself a capable adult. If you keep acting like a spoilt child, then they too will treat you like one.
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Even though they may be friendly, your parents will always be your parents first. So you can¡¯t suddenly get offended or affected if they are opinionated about your life or don¡¯t always see things your way. It¡¯s going to be a balancing act, but it¡¯s definitely worth the effort.
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At the end of the day they are your parents, and there are certain things you shouldn¡¯t say to them. To be fair, there are certain things they shouldn¡¯t say to you either. So just because there is a newly found ¡®friend¡¯ status, it absolutely doesn¡¯t mean there are no boundaries.
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While it¡¯s not cool when elders drone on and on about how they know more than you, or how much of the world they¡¯ve seen (even if it may be true), there¡¯s merit in listening to them and taking their advice. They do know more than us and would love it if we learnt a thing or two from them. This is also why it makes sense for us to befriend our parents and learn from the long and often arduous journeys they¡¯ve had.
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To be friends with your folks ¨C well that¡¯s kind of an ideal scenario. But you know when it¡¯s truly possible? When you all are on the same team. If your parents are understanding and kind of cool and are always gunning for you, you can safely assume they are on your team.
This is the biggest asset you can have in your arsenal. And make no mistake ¨C there are a lot of people out there who yearn for such a story. There are lots of parent-child combinations in the world who don¡¯t see eye to eye or would never be on the proverbial ¡®same team¡¯.
If you give this some serious thought and do come to the conclusion that your parents have weird ways but have always wanted the best for you then yes ????????¡ª they are on your team!
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No harm can come out of being friends with your folks. As you age, they age too; learn to value their presence and deal with them patiently. Learn to talk to them and not just dismiss everything they say. Learn to listen to their advice, even if it feels unnecessary at times.
Don¡¯t do it because it¡¯s a task, do it because it could really enrich your life. It won¡¯t be the worst idea to have them weigh on a problem you are having at work, or in a relationship.
You¡¯ll be surprised at how they give you great advice while being concerned for you too. The older you grow, the more relaxed your equation with your folks could become. After all, they don¡¯t need to chaperone you anymore. If anything, it might be the other way round. :)