The boundaries and boundaries of dating and relationships in today's times have changed spectacularly. While many believe in the idea of long-term commitment and a happily ever after, for many, a happily ever after has nothing to do with long-term commitment. For many, dating is just as casual as it comes.
There may not be a fixed definition of "casual dating," but it is when two people like each other romantically and like hanging out with one another. However, despite going on dates there is no compulsion of getting into a long-term relationship or any sort of commitment. It is basically when someone likes another person casually but not enough to get into a much more serious relationship or just does not want to get involved with anyone in general.
With modern ways of living, the way people live their lives has also changed. Both men and women are much more independent than they used to be. Women in general are breaking out of their traditional roles where they are supposed to oblige and uphold certain values such as honour and taking care of the household. Thanks to the various stresses in life, many people don't want the emotional baggage of giving their time and commitment to a long-term relationship while not giving up on companionship entirely. This is where casual dating comes into the picture.?
"I had made up my mind since after school itself that I don't want to get heartbroken or get too into someone, so I have been casually dating people for a while now. It has been working well for me. Sometimes, the men I get involved with get serious, and then it gets messy, but I always tell them beforehand that it won't go anywhere. I do feel selfish sometimes, but I have my friends to talk to about things, and my physical needs are not very hard to fulfil, so I am happy. I have been through the entire breaking-up process, and I just don't want to get my feelings hurt," says 25-year-old Saloni.
The increasing acceptance of the internet and more importantly the online dating culture has made casual dating much more accessible in India. People can be connected to anyone and everyone from miles away, and more importantly, having many more options than before makes it easier to date more than one person. "This dynamic has seen a shift with more modern expectations, with many relationships being more casual and people often getting to know each other through activities like online dating," says India's Country Manager for the Gleeden dating app, Sybil Shiddell.
"With the increasing acceptance of progressive values like gender equality, fluidity in relationships, and individual choice, or be it the need for companionship due to high levels of workforce mobility, people move from city to city regularly, making it harder for traditional relationships to work out. No matter what is driving this shift in attitude towards dating, one thing is clear: people want companionship in their lives as much now as ever before. It makes sense that dating providers are responding with new platforms tailored for those seeking something different," adds Shiddell.
In this modern era of dating, the idea of infidelity and being in love has slowly become a thing of the past. The idea of compromising in a relationship is something people don't want to do. While this may work out for many nowadays, it may definitely be something the older generation may look down upon.
"According to the survey conducted by Gleeden and IPSOS, it revealed that 82% of the respondents feel it is possible to stay faithful to the same person for their entire lives, while 44% of people felt it is possible to be in love with two different people at the same time. Interestingly, 37% of people think it is possible to cheat on a person while still being in love with them, whereas 55% of respondents fancy being intimate with someone other than their partners."
As mentioned, it depends from person to person how well casual dating can work for them. But if two people have decided that dating casually is what they want to go forward with, then here are some points to follow to make it successful:
You may be someone who is into a casual relationship and you probably have thought this through right before starting something new, but that may not be the case with the other. So, before starting anything new, let the parties involved know. Clear all your inhibitions and clarify the space you are in so that no one gets unknowingly hurt later.
While you may have maintained in the beginning about what you want, it is dating after all, and as humans, feelings may change. If you are hanging out with someone on a regular basis, keep mentioning your intentions time and again to keep things perfectly clear.
Sure, dating one or several people at a time can get exhausting at some point. But involving yourself mentally and physically in the dating game can make you forget or ignore the things that you like. Growing, expanding, and taking care of yourself should not be avoided. Make sure to do the things you like and maintain relationships outside of dating.
Just because it is casual does not mean it does not mean anything. You are after all spending a lot of time with the person and getting to know the person. So, instead of ghosting them or randomly disappearing from the face of the earth, tell them that things are not working out. Tell them that you want to discontinue talking for whatever reason it is. At least, there will be closure.
Whether you like it or not, with the new generations, the trends are changing as well.