Taj Bibi, who is 33 years old, is still grappling with the loss of her three husbands who were killed while fighting militants.
Now, her fourth husband is offto battle the Taliban as an Afghan soldier, and she's hoping his fate won¡¯t be the same as that ofhis three brothers who were also her first three husbands.
According to Reuters, Taj Bibi, who is also pregnant with her sixth child, hopesthe men in power don¡¯t make her a widow for a fourth time.
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"I can¡¯t afford to see my five children being orphanedagain," said Bibi who lives in the Sadeqabad area of mountainous Kunarprovince in eastern Afghanistan.
Bibi was 18 when she got married for the first time toAminullah¡¯s oldest brother, who was a soldier. Life was good, Bibi says, untilher husband was killed in a battle with the Taliban. Within months, she marriedher his younger brother, also a soldier.
It is common in ethnic Pashtun society for widows to marrytheir brothers-in-law because of a belief that a widow should not marry outsidethe family.
But even before she came to terms with her new life, apregnant Bibi had to identify the bloody body of her second husband, who waskilled defending a check-point from a Taliban attack.
After 90 days of mourning, she agreed to her father-in-law¡¯srequest that she marry his third son, a police officer. He was killed in aclash with the Taliban in 2017.
That same year, Bibi married Aminullah, the fourth brother,who accepted his three-time widowed sister-in-law as his wife along with herchildren.
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"Sometimes I blame the Taliban, sometimes I blame the Afghangovernment, sometimes I blame the foreign forces but mostly I blame myself forall this pain," Bibi told Reuters over the telephone.
Bibi is a devout Muslim and prays five times a day."Islam teaches us not to kill anyone, but here in our land we just killanyone and everyone," she said.
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"I don¡¯t know if Allah understands my pain and loss."
She said people die once but after losing three husbands,she felt like she¡¯d already died three times. "Maybe I¡¯m justunlucky."
Clashes between Afghan government forces and Talibaninsurgents have not died down, despite peace talks in Qatar that have raisedhopes for an end to Afghanistan¡¯s seemingly endless cycle of war.
At least 60 members of the Afghan security forces werekilled across the country, last week.