Should You Try To Get Your Ex Back? Experts Say Ask Yourself These 7 Questions First!

Most people have an ex they would never, ever, ever, ever get back with. But it's also pretty likely that there¡¯s this one EX from your past, who you probably have unfinished business with. There is absolutely no shame in admitting that a part of you hasn¡¯t been able to move on or that you want to rekindle your romance all over again with this ex. But having said that, it's also not wise to take this as a cue and get back with an ex, because after all, things ended between you two for a reason.

People break-up for a whole lot of reasons - infidelity, distance, timing, career, goals, and there is no said rule regarding which reason is reconcilable. That¡¯s for the two of you to decide. But, should you try to get back with your ex? These seven questions should make arriving at that difficult decision fairly simple.

1. Are you really still in love or are you just lonely?

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People love companionship and since we are social beings, getting into relationships is not only a romantic concept, it is important survival. So, no wonder you are going to miss spending time with your ex. But ask yourself this: Do you miss your ex or just a warm body? Loneliness is easy to solve: get a pet or go to a networking event. But if you miss unique qualities associated with your ex, then there is something to pursue for sure.

2. Why did you break-up in the first place?

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This question is an important one because how you answer it will determine if you should get back together and whether the effort is worth it. Some people break up because of infidelity, distance or time but some reasons can be let go of and some can¡¯t. Be sure of this first.

3. Has anything changed since you both broke up?

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Just because love didn't work out the first time doesn¡¯t mean it's doomed. But in order to have a different outcome next time you try, you need to know for sure that something has changed or else history will repeat itself. Always know that¡¯s very rare for people to change fundamentally, so if you broke up because of a personality trait then I am sorry to break it to you, but no matter how many times you give this person a chance, things won¡¯t work out.

4. Did you genuinely try to move on?

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Have you actually tried to move on? Most people stick it out in relationships even when they are treated badly because they have already invested a lot of time in this relationship. If that¡¯s the rationale behind reuniting with your ex, then it¡¯s time for some serious self-introspection.

5. Are you ready to put in the effort required for a second run?

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One thing is for sure: a second run at a broken relationship requires a lot of effort. It¡¯s important to be honest with yourself about whether or not you have the commitment, energy to improve this relationship? If not, you are bound to make the same mistakes and break up in the future.

6. What do your family and friends think about you getting back?

When you are overly attached to a particular situation, you develop blind spots and might not be able to judge it accurately. That¡¯s why you can always seek advice from your loved ones about whether or not the reunion is a good idea. If everyone who loves you is of the opinion that a reunion doesn¡¯t sound like a good idea, it may be wise to take note. Because when we hurt, people close to us hurt too. On the other hand, if everyone around you is thrilled with the idea, then that's a good sign that you should consider getting back together.

7. Can you both trust each other fully again?

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A relationship won¡¯t survive unless it rests comfortably on a solid foundation of trust. If infidelity was the reason for your break-up, then you need to decide if you can whole-heartedly trust your partner again. For many, cheating is a permanent deal breaker, but some might able to look past it. The decision is yours entirely.

Are you prepared for the very real possibility that you may be heartbroken again? If you answered "yes," then take the leap. Love is always worth the risk, and not everyone perfects it the first time around. Be honest with yourself. Know that you have options, and take the time to sort through them all. At the end of the day, the only thing you should be chasing is your own happiness.