Pride Month 2024: 9 stereotypes gay people are tired of clarifying

It¡¯s Pride Month worldwide, and the rainbow flags are fluttering high. Gay communities around the world are undoubtedly in a celebration mode. Pride Month is not only for people who are part of LGBTQIA+ but also for allies and people willing to learn and understand more about the community's trials and tribulations.

While talking about the LGBTQIA+ community, it is not hard to miss some of the stereotypes that have come to be associated with it over time. Is that a good or a bad thing? This is another question to address, but it is exhausting for queer people to keep clarifying the stereotypes time and again.

So, this Pride Month, let's learn about some things gay people are just too tired of hearing. If you are meeting an LGBTQIA+ member, steer away from these stereotypical (read: rude) things to say/ask someone who is gay.

1. Who¡¯s the man/girl in the relationship?

It¡¯s fascinating for people to meet queer couples and wonder how they make it work staying away from the binary ideas of heterosexual couples. The queer community is fighting every day to normalise the non-binary ideas of existence that go against them. Hence, it is extremely rude to try and fit their relationship in a (binary) box.

The better question to answer your curiosity is: ¡°Is it difficult to manage in society as a queer couple?¡± This leaves the answer open-ended and the couple you're asking this will surely be more comfortable when responding, instead of rolling their eyes.

2. When did you become gay?

This is probably the most common thing I have heard people getting wrong. Nobody becomes gay, people are born like this. It may be a different journey of realising and accepting oneself for everyone, but you definitely can¡¯t become gay overnight. The better thing to ask is: "When did you realise you were gay?"

3. If I were gay, would you hit on me?

No, they probably won¡¯t. When someone tells you that they are gay, know that it comes after a lot of overthinking, inner turmoil and fear, don¡¯t reduce it to something as small as ¡°hitting¡± on someone. If you are curious to know what they are into, simply ask: "What are you into," or "Who are you attracted to?"

4. My other friend is also gay, do you know him?

Given that an average of only 9% of adults identify as LGBTQIA+ around the world according to the Ipsos LGBT+ Pride 2023 survey, gay people don¡¯t know every other gay person on the planet. Politely suggest: "I have a gay friend if you are open to meeting people!"

5. You don¡¯t look gay!

You don¡¯t look straight! What does being gay look like? It is just a stereotype that the general population thought of and, subsequently, it picked up on social media. Gay people come in all shapes and sizes; try to keep away from stereotypes and embrace people for who they are.

6. Who pays on the date?

Again saying something like this instills a binary stereotype. It is entirely up to the people going on a date and none of anybody else¡¯s business. Don¡¯t ask anyone this irrespective of their sexual orientation.

7. Gays have it so easy!

It is an assumption and making assumptions about people¡¯s personal lives is just a big no-no, whether straight or gay! In my opinion, nobody has it easy. Everybody deals with their share of problems and issues, however different they may seem from the other side. Don¡¯t assume!

8. Are you sure you are gay?

As I mentioned earlier, nobody becomes gay overnight. It is years of assessing, learning and unlearning that make one accept their sexual orientation. If somebody comes out to you, show them some support and love instead of adding to their self-doubt. Do better!

9. He is my gay friend!

Nobody ever introduced you as a straight friend! Introducing someone by putting their sexual orientation upfront is directly reducing their whole personality to just their sexual orientation.

First of all, nobody should reveal anybody¡¯s sexual orientation, it¡¯s their story to share when they feel right to do so.

What do you think about this? Tell us in the comments.

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