She Was Trapped In A Boy's Body. Here's How A 16-Year-Old Set Herself Free

In July, Vasant Valley School student Krishna Singh, 16, hung up his boy's uniform for good.

Might be the youngest Indian transgender you've ever heard of

Naina Singh TOI YouTube

He switched to the gender-neutral physical education uniform and started hormone replacement therapy. Now, she goes by Naina Singh and wears a salwar-kameez to school. Naina plans to get a sex reassignment surgery after her Class XII exams. Naina is singularly young for an Indian transgender identifying herself as one. Most, if they stay in school at all, identify as homosexuals first. Typically, they also enjoy little support from family. There are parents like Shivy's, the NRIs who packed off their 19-year-old transgender child to India to make him behave like a girl.

A supportive family

And there's Mishi Singh, Naina's mother, who thinks her daughter has "pretty legs". About the time, his parents were forcibly admitting Shivy into a college in Agra, Mishi was buying Naina her first dress in Mumbai. With the support of family, friends, school authorities and counsellors, Krishna is taking the first steps toward transforming into Naina. She loves make-up, is growing her hair, talks about her experiences on her YouTube channel (Nainaqueenb), has installed selfie-lighting in her room and is a 6'8" stunner in six-inch heels.

While most parents spend years in denial, Mishi took Krishna to counsellors as early as in 2011. "I thought he was gay, but my worst nightmare was he'd be a girl. I didn't want him to suffer. Mishi believes parents "always know." I'd show him remote-control cars in toy shops but he'd want stuffed toys. He kept asking for wigs, even made ones with ribbons," she says. Ballet was actively discouraged.

Coming out, and suicide attempts

At 12, Krishna told Mishi he might be gay using a convoluted line borrowed from counsellors: "I think I'm openly confused about being gay." On August 20, 2013, he came out "to the whole universe" answering an anonymous question on social media. "Something was still missing," says Naina. "You're still a guy and people expect muscles. I thought transgenderism was cross-dressing."

Naina's squad

The summer of 2014 brought depression and suicide attempts. "Forty-one percent transgender people commit suicide," she says. In September, the counsellors called Mishi and Naina's elder sister to inform them that that "without any doubt, Krishna is a woman". By November, everyone rallied to get Naina to write her exams. "They are her angels," says Mishi of her friends. "This generation is different." Naina's "squad" waited outside a mall while she hunted for size 10 heels, they carried her when she tottered wearing them. One friend's timely intervention scuttled a suicide attempt.

Vasant Valley, which Krishna has attended from nursery, allowed her to address IX to XII graders in January. "I was allowed to tell my story but to the senior classes. How do you explain sex-reassignment surgery to a sixth-grader?" It was July before everything changed. Mishi and Naina took a trip to Mumbai. "We went shopping, bought make-up and talked over dinner. I saw how happy she was," says Mishi. On the flight back to Delhi, Mishi told Naina she's going to get her started on HRT and laser-hair removal. They're too late for the voice-it's already low. "In the west, they use hormone blockers. Those would've stopped the voice from changing." Naina informed her principal she's not wearing trousers anymore and will use the nurse's loo. She was allowed to change uniform, grow her hair and has been registered with the CBSE as a transgender. The documents have to be changed-legally, Naina is still Krishna-and the surgery will be followed by about four months of recovery. After that, she'll head abroad for further studies.

People stare

It hasn't been easy. Mishi, an outdoor designer, has had to field questions from friends at parties and kids at school who want to know why Krishna is wearing a girl's uniform. People stare. Naina's painted nails shocked a construction worker and she was once "thrown out" of a salon by a beautician who, she says "ran away screaming." "But among our family and close friends no one was surprised or shocked," says Mishi. It's such a relief. Not accepting it makes everyone uneasy. Once the 'secret's' out, you have moved forward. Parents need to get things in perspective if they don't want an unhappy kids or a loser on drugs." Naina's take is simpler: "Why bother with things you can't change? There are bigger problems, like poverty."

(Originally published in the Times of India)