We Spoke To 5 Men About Long Distance Relationships And It Was Full Of Revelations!

LDR is probably the most dreaded acronym in the book of all lovers. This phenomenon has been discussed till kingdom come. However, it¡¯s always been a general analysis, a commentary of sorts, or just hearing the woes of women who are caught in such relationships. We are all too familiar with the emotional complications and the challenges they present. But how about, for a change, hearing what men have to say about them? We got five men to share their perspective and tell us what really goes on in their mind when they find themselves in such commitments. Here¡¯s what came our way:

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Your twenties are the time you can actually make such associations work. While men in their early twenties are a bit fearful and hesitant, those in their late twenties are more open to the idea. Says Tahir, 28, ¡°This is the time when we want to devote most of our energy to building careers and pursuing other interests. So keeping that in mind, a long distance relationship is actually a blessing in disguise since you have the space and flexibility to do your own things. In such an arrangement, I don¡¯t feel emotionally dependent on the other person¡±. Danish Raja, 26, endorses the same view. According to him, long distance relationships work best as there is no pressure of an immediate commitment. You can see how it goes and then take a more serious decision.

Thirties

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Long distance relationships are merely for casual dating, says 30-year -old Shivan Bhaskaran. He feels that if both partners are driven enough to make it work, it¡¯s worth the effort. Otherwise it¡¯s best to consider this option for casual dating ¨C you talk when you can, meet when possible and save yourself the heartbreak and expenditure involved. Hotelier Anshuman Pancholi, 30, is of the opinion that one can carry on in such a relationship to a certain extent, but eventually at some stage the man needs to have the woman around for emotional support. It¡¯s very important that you get to spend some time with your partner.

Thirty five and above

Gaurav Mehta, 35, braved a year¡¯s stint away from his wife when she went away to a culinary school in Paris. ¡°If you have taken a mutual decision to be apart for a certain period of time then it becomes easier to deal with the separation. In today¡¯s times, where partners want to encourage each other to have equal opportunities, the long distance trend is becoming common in marriages as well,¡± he says.

Karan Narang, 37, says space is the key. While there are bound to be challenges, it¡¯s important to give a little space to create proper understanding.

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Forties and above

For a lot of men in their forties and above, long distance relationships evoke a sense of nostalgia since they feel that in today¡¯s times with the access to technology and other mediums of communication, distance is hardly a barrier anymore. Some of them, who did endure long distance relationships in their younger days, wish they had it as easy. Yet, at the same time the absence of so many options made their struggles worth it. Says Sanjiv Anand, 57, ¡°since the bond is largely based on a mental connect you work harder at keeping the commitment going. Yes, at times the distance can get to you but a positive attitude and the right mind frame can help you overcome the lack of physical proximity¡±.

Mickey Jolly, 45, however, is of the opinion that there is no set formula for making such relationships work. With a large number of marriages being long distance, he feels that it is more about the values shared between two individuals.

While guys in the age bracket of 25-30 seem to have a more carefree and experimental attitude towards long distance relationships, men in their mid and late thirties are more serious and sensitive about them. They understand the complication and have a more practical approach to handling it. But what both generations seem to agree on is the fact that in today¡¯s times, given our hectic schedules and demands of career, a long distance relationship becomes inevitable at some stage ¨C whether it's while dating or in a marriage. With age comes acceptance and maturity, and that is the case with men over the age of forty, when it comes to such relationships.

If you¡¯ve found yourself in such a situation, let us know what your thoughts are!

Cover image courtesy twinkleidea.com