When you start to date someone, you hope to see a future with them. The future could be anything depending on the dynamics and what the people involved want. Whether it is a long-term relationship, marriage or even kids. There can be several possibilities. However, when the promises are nothing more than a manipulative tactic then it surely is a problem.?
Future faking is essentially painting a rosy picture of the future to gain something in the present.? It can involve grand pronouncements about vacations you'll take together, careers you'll build side-by-side, or even the adorable children you'll have. The promises are often vivid, detailed, and emotionally charged, designed to hook you in and keep you invested making you think of things much more deeply.?
Not all promises about the future are fake. So, how do you tell the difference between genuine dreams and manipulative tactics? Here are some red flags to watch out for:
The future faker may talk about "someday" or "when the time is right," but never commit to concrete dates or actions. Basically, there are a lot of promises without actual actions.?
The promises are often one-sided, focusing on what you'll do or achieve together while offering little about the faker's own commitments or contributions to actually getting the future running.?
The faker may make grand plans but never take any steps to make them happen. Conversations about the future remain just that - conversations. This can make you wonder as to when things will actually take place.?
The details of the future plan may change frequently, making it difficult to pin down the faker's true intentions. Be it the timing or even the agenda of the future that is promised.?
If you suspect someone is future faking you, here are some steps you can take:
Express your concerns and ask for specifics about the plans. See if the faker can provide concrete details and timelines. This could be anything related to wanting to get married or going on that trip.?
Don't let promises of a future you're unsure about pressure you into making decisions you're not comfortable with. Don't let yourself extend your boundaries unless there is a surety.?
If something feels off about the promises, it probably is. Don't ignore your intuition. When the first instinct makes you doubt something, it generally is true until situations make you believe otherwise.?
Talk to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist about your concerns. They can offer an objective perspective and help you navigate the situation.
You deserve a future built on genuine connection, shared commitment, and concrete actions, not empty promises. By understanding future faking and recognizing its red flags, you can protect yourself from manipulation and build a future that is truly your own.